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2009 Mission From God

by Gary Turner


These trips to the home brewers Mecca began in 2007 when Jeff and I had decided (in a drunken state) to either go to the week long home brewing school sponsored by Siebel’s in Durango, CO or go to our first National Homebrewers Conference in Denver. This would more than likely be much less expensive and probably more entertaining because of the amount of breweries and brew pubs in the immediate Denver area. The rest as they say is history. Oakland makes our third conference in a row and Minneapolis, MN will more than likely make our fourth…..fear not for I still plan on making the Durango trip someday!!!

The first day of the journey finished up at Albuquerque, NM where we met up with my brother and his family. Albuquerque has two really great brew pubs that we have been to; Kelly’s located near the college and Chama River Brewing Company over on the interstate. Seeing how we had visited Kelly’s in 07 on our road trip to Denver we decided we would give Chama the nod on this trip. All in all….a great call. They had six beers on tap, four seasonal beers and an excellent food selection varying from standard bar fare to fine cuisine. We all had a beer sampler, which we supposed would only have the six beers and maybe one of the seasonal beers….well bludgeon me with a shillelagh….all ten beers were brought to us on several trays! I was glad the food was soon served or we would have probably drunk ourselves into oblivion on day one of the trip! There is nothing worse than a hangover and about a thousand miles to go the next day. My nieces thought it was bad enough that Uncle Gary had broken out in some fine Irish ditties.

Day two had us venturing towards Flagstaff, AZ and of course a side trip to the Grand Canyon. If you’re that close you have to go…if only it had a brew pub nearby! Well it kind of does, however it’s about 70 plus miles south through one of the most scenic drives that wormed its way through several beautiful national forests and ranches. Located near the old historic train station is Beaver Street Brewery! The exterior wasn’t particularly eye catching and had more of a small mini mall feel to it. Inside however, is a very beautiful pub with a very scenic and shaded beer garden located on the back of the property that one could imagine ones self soaking up the shade and brews after a hard day of riding. The only down point was the constant string of trains that snaked back and forth along the tracks! For some reason or another I was having flash backs of Midland before the high speed lines were put in! BS Brewery had four of their regular beers on tap with four other seasonal brews. One sampler, two pints and a fine dinner later it was time to call it a night! Did I mention those damned trains? No sleep was to be had if you are anywhere near the main line in this town!

Holy cheep chit! This was going to be the long day, Flagstaff to Bakersfield, CA! Not bad, plenty to see and then looming in the distance…the California state line! “Do you have any animals or fruits to declare?” asked the officer. I told the gentleman, “Just my cousin!” He was not amused with my sense of humor. The Mojave Desert; untold hours of straight roads and speed limit signs that were obviously only there as a suggestion! I was having flash backs of southern Afghanistan, with the only exception that the roads were in pretty fair condition and I did not see one Taliban, Kuchi tribesman nor camel in sight! Just at the point where my ass was just about to grow feet and slide me into an even more uncomfortable contorted position behind the wheel, I saw what appeared to be civilization. My hopes were dashed, it was only a cross road with only two lanes of traffic…congested two lanes traffic I might add! The only buildings were four convenient store like structures on either side of the intersections selling gas! What a cluster of traffic, fumes of gasoline and diesel trucks filled the air and I wanted a beer. Nay…beers! Finally, after a few more hours…beautiful waving hills of lush waste high grass caressed the rolling hills, orchards and lush green farming communities; Bakersfield at last!!! Hidden in an industrial park on the edge of town is the Lengthwise Brewery! Butts aching, stomachs growling and livers dreading the sweet elixir we were about to punish it with, we hobbled on in like two old geezers from the geriatric Olympics. Touted as the best brew pub in Bakersfield it lives up to its name. Of course, I would have to check but I think it is the only brew pub in town. The fish, chips and beer hit the spot and we grabbed a growler to go, located our hotel and called it an evening. Every desert needs an oasis and Lengthwise filled the tab on that.

Ahhhhh, Santa Rosa, California, located in the beautiful Napa Valley lays the fabled brewery whose mere name evokes a smile and spontaneous day dreaming of naked well endowed strippers named Candi and Bambi who cater to your every alcoholic induced need; the Russian River Brewing Company ( )! Home of such great beers as: Russian River IPA, Blind Pig, OVL Stout, Damnation, Sanctification, Temptation and a myriad of others. Did I happen to mention Pliny the Elder (a moment of silence….amen)? This is where we rendezvous with Chad and Bad Rock of the Brewing Network, several members of the BN Army, our Aussie brothers Peter, Deale and friends new and old from other conferences. The head brewer at the pub was kind enough to break into the wood aged cask of Mortification, a quadruple Belgian that was right at 11% ABV! After spending several hours of visiting, eating and drinking we decide to call it a day and prepare for the next days activities; The Brewing Network’s Fourth Anniversary!

At 10:00 a.m. the next morning we all gathered outside the Marriot and awaited our two busses that the Brewing Network had provided for our tour of the brewing Holy Land. Tasty McDole was serving his Sam Adams Longshot winner from a Cornelius keg as we waited to board, while other BN minions loaded up a keg and a case of different brews onto each bus! Pace myself I thought! This is a marathon….not a sprint. JP, Beevo and Push Eject were our bus tour guides and away we went. Anchor Steam brewery, Moylan’s Brewery and Restaurant, Beer Beer and More Beer and then finally the Linden Street Brewery for the 4th anniversary of the Brewing Network. Great company, music, food and beer galore! Beer was provided by: The 21st Amendment, Marin Brewing Co., Stone, Drake’s, Black Diamond, BJ’s, Triple Rock, Schooners, Ale Industries, The Bruery, Firestone, Lagunitas, Linden Street, Moylans, Sacramento Brewing Co. and more! There was also homebrew from almost the whole BN radio crew as well! What a blast. The crazy thing was that the NHC didn’t even start until the next day and our livers were already mush! Are you beginning to get the picture that in the Bay Area there is either a brewery or brew pub on almost every corner? Why can’t we at least have one back home? I mean hell; Artesia has The Well Head for cripes sake!!! Artesia?!?!?!?!

Sippin’ on the Dock of the Bay, the 31st annual American Homebrewers Association’s National Homebrewer’s Conference was in short….awesome! This was the best conference we have attended! There were 38 professional breweries on Pro-Brewer’s Night, 35 home brew clubs that sponsored club night and 19 local brew clubs that had a constant supply of beer on tap in the hospitality suite! There were literally hundreds of different beers to sample! Of course as is with homebrew, some were delicious little slices of heaven….and unfortunately some that sucked!!! SO next time you brew up a batch of sub-par swill….don’t worry, give it to your friends. The hospitality suite is also where the vendors and sponsors hang their spurs during the event. Sponsor’s such as: Siebel’s, SABCO, Blichmann, BB and more B, William’s, Briess, White Labs, WYEAST, Northern Brewer, Samuel Adams, Five Star and many more. This is the latest and greatest place to catch up on future equipment ideas and needs, the place to visit with actual people you buy “all” of your material from! Got a question, ask the pro! Got a suggestion, tell the pro. Just remember not to drool on all the high end gadgetry!

This year’s selection of speakers was equally awesome! Dr. Charles Bamforth who is an Anheuser-Busch Endowed Professor of Malting and Brewing at UC Davis, Sam Calagione of Dogfish Head, Vinnie Cilurzo of Russian River (you know….the Pliny guy), Ray Daniels, Randy Mosher, Michael Ferguson who is the Director of Contract Brewing and training with BJ’s, Charlie Papazian (the Godfather of home brewing) and many, many more. These are the guys on the cutting edge of the industry sharing their tips of the trade with the home brewers of the world. Man…it just doesn’t get any better than that. My mind filled with great information and my head aching from so many days of abuse, it made me so happy when I heard that most of the lectures would be saved on the AHA web site!

Oh yeah, I failed to mention that in and around the immediate area of the Marriot convention where we were staying are five brewpubs and several fine eateries. Unfortunately there is never enough time to check out all of the places of interest, c’est la vie! Saturday evening had us double checking our road trip home, and preparing for the evenings grand banquet and award ceremony. Unfortunately neither Jeff nor I had a second round contender, so we were there for the food! Chef Sean Paxton had prepared a three course meal with Rogue beer pairings. The first course was a fine salad with Asian noodles mixed with sesame Hefe dressing and a slaw consisting of butter lettuce and tangerines. This was paired with Rogue’s Mom Hefeweizen. The main course consisted of Charlie Ale brined pork loin with caramelized onions and thyme mashed potatoes blended with Mom Ale, seasonal vegetables with an apricot chutney made with Somer Ale, orange peel and honey and a Charlie demi-glaze infused with shallots and cherries. Or if you were like us you got chicken!!! LOL but it was prepared as mentioned above. Man I was really looking forward to the pork! The bastards…. The final course was a fine desert; a Chocolate Hazelnut Mousse infused with two chocolate and the Rogue Hazelnut Brown Ale, served in a chocolate shell and topped with cocoa nibs and 120L Crystal Malt. Drooooooooool! My mouth still waters over that one and it’s been exactly a month since the conference! After the awards were all handed out, pleasantries and e-mails were exchanged with promises of keeping in touch better this next year and hopes of seeing each other again soon.

The next morning found us on the road early! We had to find a BevMo liquor store before leaving California in order to boot leg a bunch of brew home! Our trip that Sunday would have us stopping for lunch at the Silver Peak Brewery in Reno and then on to Squatters Pub and Brewery for dinner and brews in Salt Lake City. Both places were wonderful and I wished we would have had more time to spend there and savor each and every one of their brews. But we had to book it back home. The next days drive was absolutely beautiful as we made a lunch and beer stop at Kannah Creek Brewing Company in Grand Junction and then wound through the mountains leading in and going through Silverton Colorado and then on to Durango for our final brew pub of the trip, Steamworks Brewing Company.

Finally the 2009 Mission from God tour was over as we hit the Texas line and meandered back to Midland. Jeff still had to drive to Fredericksburg the next morning, but not until we tackled a Pliny and some Lagunitas Sumptin Sumptin. Having our fill of beer and being, dare I say it; just about burned out on hoppy beer we called it an evening. “Hmm, Minneapolis!” Jeff says. “Yeah…..I wonder what’s in Minneapolis!” I replied. “Where’s that road atlas?”